Like A Child
I’m very new to the grandparenting game. Anne and I have a 1 ½ year old granddaughter in New Jersey, Ellie. And another coming in Seattle this month. We currently exist in that rather strange place of walking with parents approaching the end of life, while also helping our kids who are starting to have children. Recently we had two weeks on the east coast (NYC, NJ), with extended Ellie-time which included: playing, going to the park, walking, reading books and learning more about being grandparents. With our own kids all in their thirties, I had forgotten some of both the sheer delight and very hard work of caring for little ones. Spending time with Ellie feels like watching a miracle unfold, and I was drawn back to the scripture texts in Matthew 19, Mark 10 and Luke 18, all of which contain the well-known story of Jesus blessing children. All three quote Jesus saying “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
Those words came to me on a morning run in Liberty State Park. in Jersey City. I was jogging across the wooden promenade, gazing past a flock of geese floating in the Hudson River and out to Ellis Island and the Statue of Liberty. I started to think about what Jesus was seeing when his eyes landed on the children. What was it about kids that Jesus valued so highly as to say the kingdom actually belonged to them, or to people who acted like them? I thought about what I’d been learning from Ellie, and two things popped into mind:
1) Dependence- As a 1 ½ year old, Ellie is of course learning about being INdependent, sometimes fiercely so. Yet, her life is absolutely dependent on her parents and those caring for her. Meals are made, baths prepared, clothes washed and put on, daycare arranged, celebrations, playground exploration, bedtime–everything about her is dependent on those who love her deeply. Ellie’s life, and her thriving in life, is intimately tied to someone other than herself.
No one is more intensely independent than Americans, and our culture consistently proclaims that we are what we earn or possess. We are brought up to believe what the famous 19th century poem by Ernest Henly says, “I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.” As attractive and sometimes motivating as this thought might be, it is a stark contrast to the biblical picture–we are utterly dependent beings. We not only need other people–family (literal or figurative) and friends–in order to thrive and mature, but we need God to breathe life into us, be present with us and hold us in his deep love. When little Ellie raises her tiny hands up and wiggles her fingers, it means “pick me up, please!” She knows, in that moment, she is utterly dependent. We are no different.
2) Wonder- So many times in those last weeks, I held Ellie’s hand as she took her still uncertain little steps, stumbling over uneven pavement or pebbled park trails. Sometimes I picked her up so we could make a little progress on a walk or toward a destination. It was in those times that her sheer wonder at the tiniest things came out. Stopping near a bush with crinkly leaves meant reaching out to first touch them, then to maybe pick a dried leaf, then crunch it in her hand, then hand it to me. Or pointing–looking with awe at dogs, children, bikes or trees, pointing as though she was seeing it for the first time…which she sometimes was. Paper on the ground, sticks, grass, a metal fence, everything was worth investigating, then pointing at it to make sure I saw it too– “Can you believe this?! What is THAT?!” Everything is worthy of wonder.
It was once so for all of us, too, but somewhere along the line we grew up. We began to take things for granted and rush past them. We learned to pay attention to glitzy, glamorous things and lost the unhurried wonder of just noticing. Surely this is what Psalm 8 is thinking of:
“Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth!
…When I consider your heavens, the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
what is mankind that you are mindful of them,
human beings that you care for them?
Wonder is underrated. Rabbi Abraham Heschel testified that “Never once in my life did I ask God for success or wisdom or power or fame. I asked for wonder, and he gave it to me.”
We can’t manufacture wonder, it has to well up inside us–but we can block it. The archenemy of wonder is hurry. How do we look for what God is doing, how do we pay attention if we are frantically rushing? Sensing wonder requires things many of us seem to have outgrown–quiet, solitude, meditation.
Dependence and wonder are kingdom attributes, well-worth further contemplation. Maybe while taking a walk…without headphones. Or gazing out a window with a cup of warm tea in your hand. What do you depend on God for? On other people for? What do you see that fills you with wonder? When you slow down, do you see things you’ve missed? We’re not 1 ½ year olds…but we sure can learn a lot from them.
Peace of Christ,
Dan Baumgartner
Dan Baumgartner is the senior pastor at The Cove in Santa Rosa CA and currently serves on The Fellowship Community Advisory Board.
These are the expressed views of Dan Baumgartner and not necessarily broader views of The Fellowship Community.