A Pastoral Letter from PFR and the Fellowship of Presbyterians
Dear Sisters and Brothers in Christ,
Meeting in Detroit, our 221st General Assembly has taken two significant actions on the teaching and practice of marriage according to the PC(USA)’s Book of Order. First, the GA approved an Authoritative Interpretation (AI) that now permits PC(USA) pastors to conduct same-sex weddings, and allows sessions to approve the use of church property for such ceremonies. Secondly, the GA approved a proposed amendment to the Book of Order that would replace current language with a description of marriage as a relationship between “two people, traditionally a man and a woman.”
While the AI goes into effect immediately, the proposed amendment requires ratification by a majority of the presbyteries before any change could be made, a process that takes about one year. Both measures are designed to allow pastors and congregations to participate in same-sex weddings, in states where gay marriage is legal.
We grieve these actions by the General Assembly. We believe we will look back on this day and see the error of these decisions. But an Assembly of our denomination has spoken, and now we must move ahead without compromising compassion or conviction.
It is extremely important to understand that while the AI and the constitutional amendment broaden the denomination’s interpretation of marriage, they do not require any pastor to officiate or any session to authorize the use of church property for a marriage service with which they disagree. It remains up to each pastor and each session to determine what is and is not appropriate for their congregation.
Proponents of these two actions have made great effort to invite and welcome those who hold unwaveringly to a traditional interpretation of marriage to remain engaged in the mission and ministry of the PC(USA) with full integrity. Some will resolve to do this—others may not. Those of us who do remain in the PC(USA) will, no doubt, encounter other decisions and actions with which we will disagree. We are not here to fight and divide, but to continue to proclaim the good news of Jesus Christ and to testify to the transforming power of his love that is available to everyone. We urge you in the strongest possible way to refrain from actions, attitudes, and language that would mar the image of Christ in your response to the Assembly’s actions.
Let us commit to one another, and to Almighty God, that we will seek to embody the grace and love of our Savior across our theological differences, and in personal and congregational deliberations about our future in the PC(USA).
21 Responses
This is very difficult for me to read. On one hand, I’m glad we’ve at least reached a place in our denomination wherein we can simply agree to disagree. On the other, it hurts my heart feeling like I have received a blessing at my brother’s expense. Please, indulge me as I explain:
As a gay person, church has always been a very difficult place for me, and until I recently experienced the gentle guidance of my pastor, I never felt like it was a place for me at all. Don’t get me wrong — I love the Creator with all my heart. I just happen to believe that after two and a half decades of working to change my sexuality through prayer, reparative therapy, and other methods, if the Good Lord had seen fit that I should be straight, I would be by now. Those among my brethren who disagree with me have been very vocal about doing so, and I have bounced from one church to the next seeking community, sometimes not by choice. With each bounce, my heart has hardened in bits and pieces.
Now, after beginning the process of healing and letting the Spirit soften my heart, I see that there are those who disagree with me on this point of doctrine and feel that they have no place beside me among happy worshipers, and they choose to grieve or even leave. It hurts my heart to think that as I have enjoyed a blessing of inclusion from the Lord at the hands of a majority of my brothers and sisters, I have also enjoyed that blessing in such a way that I have inadvertantly displaced others.
Many who have shared my experience would say, “Well, good. It’s about time they got some of it back.” While a part of me wants to agree with that, on the whole, I don’t. If I have learned anything from my experience, I have learned that I never want anyone to have my experience regardless of their sexuality or doctrinal stances.
For those of you who feel that the congregation’s move toward acceptance and inclusion has put you out, I’m sorry, and I understand all too well how it feels when a governing church body espouses a doctrine that leaves you hurting and feeling displaced. I hope that over time, you will understand that the presence of people like me doesn’t have to come at your exclusion. People like me — LGBTQ believers — aren’t here to change your mind or heart. Even if we thought your mind and heart needed to change, it’s not our place to do that; only our Creator can do that. We would just like the opportunity to stand with you in worship and praise without receiving condemnation from or passing hurt onto you.
It is my hope that over time, rather than “look[ing] back on this day and see[ing] the error of these decisions,” you’ll get to know the brethren who are healed by this change in policy and see that this is, in fact, a blessing from the Holy Spirit for us all.
Grace and peace to you in the name of our Savior.
Nate –
This response is beautiful. I’m very moved by it. I hope you don’t mind, but I posted it on my personal blog (fordswords dot net).
I am very moved by Nate’s letter. Not because I agree with his orientation or with the decision of the General Assembly, I do not. But the point that he raises is valid about the sense of exclusion. I wish I knew a magic answer for that. Nate, I do know how hard it is to rewire who we are. What strikes me about all of this is the matter of sin. You see, we’ve chosen to focus on “THAT” sin (forgive me if you feel it isn’t – I am simply speaking my heart here, not in judgement or condemnation). I believe that, in itself is wrong. I believe God worries about ALL sin, and the choices we make in responding to his call versus those of the world. I didn’t see any focus on that in the decisions that were made by GA – simply an attempt to mediate a worldly battle by dueling with scripture. So I am not likely to get to a point where I believe in the decisions made by GA, but instead, I am praying that we focus on the real issue, not just the focus driven by our personal, human agendae. I truly love all of you and wish you peace in God’s Love. – Mark
We are compelled, by faith and love, to follow all of our Lord’s Biblical requirements and commands; we’ve not been provided the opportunity to pick and choose!! Otherwise our faith becomes as porous as a sieve!!! While we are saved by grace, and grace alone, this isn’t a license to do whatever we want!!!
Thank you for this letter and the reminder that indeed we seek to embody the grace and love of our Savior.
Thank you for your commitment to preaching the Good News of the Gospel!
Pastor, gracias por compartir esta carta. Desde la Iglesia Presbiteriana de Guatemala, seguimos cada dia las decisiones de la GA en Detroit. Nos preocupamos, pero ahora entiendo mejor la situación de PCUSA en este momento, en este tema. Yo se por cuàntos años los grupos a favor del matrimonio entre personas del mismo sexo, han llegado ante la GA, y no lograron resultados positivos,
Esperemos que Dios continúe dirigiendo a los Pastores y a las Iglesias locales para hacer decisiones buenas ante Dios y su Palabra.
Bendiciones
Sonia Gonzàles
Anciana Gobernante en Iglesia Presbiteriana El Dios Vivo, en Guastatoya, El Progreso. Guatemala, C. A.
Thank you so much for your witness.
WOW….this is truly gracious acceptance of a decision made by the body and devoid of plans to “take my marbles somewhere else.” Thank you.
I agree with the decision of the General Assembly. I believe it affirms my belief that we are to “Love one another” unconditionally. I pray that those who disagree with the me and the decision choose to stay in communion and work towards a fuller understanding of Christ and his all encompassing love and grace.
As a supporter of marriage equality and therefore the actions of the GA I was heartened to read your letter stating your opposition to these votes while also committing yourself to the continuing unity of the Presbyterian Church. You have much to teach me about faithful living just as I have much to teach you. Unity was the focus of Jesus’ prayer and it will remain a commitment of mine in the years to come. I am grateful to call you sisters and brothers in the faith.
May we all continue to pray for the Holy Spirit to guide us in compassion and in His power to proclaim Jesus Christ and the His transforming work in bringing the world to the heart of our Father! May there be no rancor and denominational idolatry in my life!
Ordained: June 14, 1970
So the Presbyterian will no longer support what the Holy Bible defines marriage to be? Do they think God made a mistake ? Did God Stutter?? Are the Presbyterian smarter than God? Why should they redefine marriage ?
Well said.
Thank you for your letter filled with grace and compassion. As a person who supports the actions of GA, I am deeply moved by your gracious response.
Hello. While it sounds amicable that there will continue to be another year in which things will be ironed out this resolution will be in full on force of hurricane magnitude long before years end. I think it is also naive to think that certain Presbyterian churches will be immune from this decision. As if they can just mosey on down the road. Mosey on down along. Without a flutter of inconvenience on the subject because they have opted out. It has been my experience that once you open the floodgate of allowing same sex marriage in your polity and doctrinal statements then you have opened a door you cannot shut with consequences you are unable to see at this time. With consequences of such a hurricane fashion that your building will not be able to withstand it. Because the GLBT agenda is a total takeover of each and every denomination and each and every church. They will come clamoring to your church that says you don’t want to have same sex weddings. They will thrust the Book of Discipline , aka, the Presbyterian Rule book in your face at some point and demand you accommodate them because it will be Presbyterian LAW. So I am afraid this naive attitude or “live and let live” attitude won’t last long. You are dealing now with unchecked wickedness. It’s out of the bag. It’s running around. It will find your doors. No doubt. I think Menlo Park Presbyterian was SMART to get out. Really smart. The rest of your churches will find it impossible at some point to keep the buildings and endowments. It will be like ECUSA. You will want to leave with everything. But it won’t be possible. I wish it wasn’t so. But I think it will be just like that. I pray that you can start getting out now. Before one years time it will be impossible for you to leave with your building and congregation intact.
Elizabeth: I have never seen this ‘GLBT agenda’ to which you refer. Would you please post a copy of it. Even my gay friends are unaware such a thing exists and they would like to see a copy of it. They have not been told what you say they are supposed to be doing.
Thanks.
I just wanted to say, I was very impressed with the tone of this statement. I have been a part of the PCUSA (by various names) since the mid 70’s when I received the Lord at Trinity Pres in Santa Ana. (no longer PCUSA) The churches I’ve attended since then have all either left the denomination, considering, or at least are connected with FOP. Currently, since moving to TX, I’ve become a member of PCA, since the only like minded church, Highland Park, was too far away to be practical. Nevertheless, I mourn with others the direction PCUSA has been on, and am grieved by recent developments that look as if it is irreversible. At the same time, I’ve been been deeply distressed for many years by the strident voices of those who claim to speak for the LORD, but whose unloving words and manner bring shame upon Christ’s name. The terms that come to mind are “snarky” ” disrepectful” “hateful”. I appreciate your call to act in a manner worthy of the Gospel.
AMEN!!!
I lean towards the PFR and FOP in their theology and understanding. I am still a PC(USA) pastor and… most likely will be the rest of my life. I, too, am glad to read their pastoral letter. It has a positive message. I am naturally what I call a watcher. I watch people, society, schools, etc. I watch for shifts (a.k.a. changes) in people and trends. The issue of open ordination and now redefining marriage is not one with which I can personally agree. Yet as I watch our 21st century USA… it strongly appears the new generations in Christ’s Church are (have?) changed the world/church I have always known. Change doesn’t bother me. Yet it should be for a positive reason. I’m not sure this direction is a positive because it undermines the authority of scripture (Revisit your reformed theology books). In other words… we as Christ’s church are adapting to the ways of society. This is not part of our foundation of faith. I can work with & minister to any person wanting to know about Jesus Christ. Yet, in good conscience, I can not marry a same-sex couple. This is my personal decision. As I “watch” the ebb and flow of the PC(USA) this has not been a wise and faithful decision. Our denomination has lost members hand over fist (this is fact… not speculation). I’m afraid we may have just opened ourselves to a few (same-sex couples) and alienated the many (those who accept the traditional & biblical view of marriage. I am not a front-line fighter. I will & do love my congregation(s). Yet I will continue to minister with a more “traditional” view and see how God can work. May God guide us and use us as we gather around Jesus’ cross. We will leave any judgment to him.
This is NOT about acceptance of the LGBT community. I have many friends that are gay, and I fully accept them and love them. Their lifestyle is not for me to judge. This issue is about MARRIAGE being between a man and a woman. It is NOT two people. I don’t know that I will be able to accept this compromise in my values and beliefs. I still don’t see how the rule book can change after 2000 years. We can love and accept without altering our values.
Inclusion vs endorsement
I think the debate here is really about the difference between including someone, vs endorsing and condoning their lifestyle.
I understand about wanting to be included. I’m a divorced Mom of 7 who homeschools who has been in Church leadership. Trust me. I know how it feels to not be included. I don’t really think that’s the issue. It’s not about inclusion so much as endorsing.
I have relatives and friends who are gay. I love them for who they are. I don’t agree with or endorse their lifestyle, they don’t agree with mine, and we’re all OK with that. I think that Jesus’ love can encompass all who call on Him. We all sin and fall short, but he loves us anyway. I’m sure that most of us grieve Him no end with our choices. We are called on to love everyone else with that same love.
But that is an entirely different issue than the recent GA announcement. What is being sought, and what will eventually happen I believe is that the gay community doesn’t just want to be included and loved, they want the Presbyterian Church to embrace, endorse, and condone their lifestyles as normal and acceptable. That’s a whole different ball game than accepting someone for who they are. If you think about it, that’s the way the society is going. It isn’t enough to just accept one another in our diversity, but we are called upon to absolutely accept and agree with anything that someone decides is OK for them. Unless it’s too “religious”, then we are shut down if we talk about it. Hmm, sounds like hypocrisy to me.
We had a choice to make as a denomination. That choice has clearly been made. Yes, it has to go through the proper process, but I think we all know what it will ultimately be.
I have a choice to make for my family. Do I want to attend a church where everyone is loved for who they are and where they are in their relationship to God, encouraged to grow in wisdom, faith and obedience? Absolutely. Do I want to be a part of a national denomination which endorses and encourages a lifestyle which is against God’s Word and Creation? Um, probably not. We’ll see what happens in the next year, but the door has been opened wide, and there is no going back. I will seek God as to what we need to do for our family.
The PCUSA has made a choice, and that choice may split us up. It may also make some of us very unpopular with society as a whole. But, really, who are we supposed to be obeying, God or Society?
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